Movies I Love Because I'm A Chick, or Movies That Influenced Me As A Woman

In my bedroom I have a poster of a cow painted by Stewart Moskowitz from 1977. The cow’s body is colored like a patchwork quilt. For the past 32 years I’ve had that cow displayed proudly on my wall. To me, it represents my personality. Each patch has a drawing within the drawing, and each patch is entirely different. In my mind, it’s like each square represents an experience, event, or person that has made me what I am to today.

Film is a very influential medium. If I looked back on all of the films I’ve seen in my life, there are certain ones that have made an impact on me. Whether they have influenced my character development, or they have resonated with me in some very personal way, there are some movies that have become very important to me. One remarkable teacher in my life once said to me that the things we find the most personal, are the things we have the most in common with others. In that spirit, I’m going to share my most favorite, personal films. Most of these have impacted me because I am a woman, that is why I entitling this Movies I Love Because I’m A Chick.

Gone With The Wind (1939)

I’m going to start with the film Gone With the Wind. Everyone is familiar with the character Scarlet O’Hara. Tough, determined, resilient, Scarlett is one of the great heroines of American Literature. But this film is on my list for another reason, Melanie Wilkes.

I was actually named after Melanie, in Gone With The Wind. My parents saw this film together and loved the qualities she represents. Unlike Scarlet, Melanie was selfless. Her character also displayed generosity, loyalty, bravery, steadfastness, as well as Christian charity. These are all qualities that my parents hoped their daughter would possess. It’s been a lot to live up to, but as a movie lover I think it’s kind of cool to be named after a movie character, and such a noble one as Melanie.

Snow White (1937)

Snow White is the first movie that I consciously remember going to. Snow White made an impression on me because she was a glass half-full kind of girl. No matter what tragedy befell her, she was stalwart, resourceful, cheerful and never full of self-pity. Never once did she sit down with Grumpy and complain about her stepmother. After all that housework, she never said a word to Doc about sore muscles, or being tired. She was always patient with Bashful, never teased Dopey, restrained herself from chiding Sleepy, and she was considerate of Sneezy, by keeping the house tidy. As far as Happy was concerned, they were kindred souls. She took a very bad situation and made the best of it. And even after all the abuse she took at the hands of the evil Queen, she was still kind, generous and trusting. Although I’m getting real tired waiting for my prince to come, I do recall the love and fidelity that the dwarfs had for Snow White. If I could just acquire and demonstrate some her qualities, perhaps I could command that level of loyalty too.

Mary Poppins (1964)

In 1964 my mother left my brother and me for the very first time to attend a weeklong retreat in the mountains. She felt so guilty about leaving us behind that every day in the mail we received a little gift. I got a Mary Poppins book, a Mary Poppins coloring book, a Mary Poppins Paper Doll, and I even received a Mary Poppins umbrella, which I subsequently ruined by jumping off a fence with it. Needless to say, I was in love with Mary Poppins.

I had no idea how strongly this movie impacted me until years later when I saw it again on DVD. This movie was so visually stunning that it influenced my whole sense of color and design. I was able to trace back my favorite color combinations to this very film and there are still fashion elements from it that I find very appealing. I had the entire soundtrack memorized and I wanted nothing more than to be “Practically Perfect In Every Way.”

When it came to Mary Poppins I was attracted to her self-assurance. She was able to stand up to the most dominant of males and hold her own, yet she was loved and appreciated by the working-glass guys. She was all for rules and order, but knew when it was time to cut loose and have fun. It was all about moderation.

Although I didn’t understand the concept at the time, Mary Poppins was a master manipulator. She knew just the right thing to say or do to get you on board and get with the program. As an adult, there have been many times I wished I could be a little more like her. Whenever I feel myself getting a little frustrated with life and want to catch the next updraft with my umbrella and float away, I remember that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. When you add a little bit of fun to any task in life it makes it more bearable. And for that piece of advice I must thank Mary Poppins.


Cat Ballou (1965)

I grew up with boys. Although I’ve had a few girlfriends in my life, for the most part, boys have always surrounded me. My neighborhood was full of boys. My closest cousins were boys, and my brother and his friends were boys. I lived in a male dominated world and even at a very young age, it didn’t take me long to discover that men were going to disappoint me.

When I saw Cat Ballou in 1965, it was a revelation for me. Catherine Ballou was shy, demure, cultured and well behaved, but underneath all that was a little spark. When all the men in her life let her down, instead of falling apart, she pulls herself together, takes charge, and gets the job done. I was awe-struck.

Now, I’m not condoning murder, or robbing trains, but the sight of Cat Ballou riding hard, and shooting straight was really exciting for me. Gone were the tears; gone was the meek, repressed, frightened young woman. In her place emerged a smart, determined, force of nature, a leader, and no one was going to keep her down.

As a young girl who was teased, bullied and repressed by the older boys on my block, Cat gave me the courage to fight back. Cat gave me permission to be smart, and Cat empowered me to hold my own in my boy dominated world.

Out of all my beloved film heroines, Cat Ballou means the most to me. I knew what it was to feel restricted and repressed, and I also knew the danger and exhilaration of standing up for myself. You have to remember that Cat Ballou was released in 1965. I still had to face the 70’s and the era of Women’s Lib. Cat Ballou stood with me when I demanded to take Shop instead of Home Ec. She was with me when I was the first girl to join the Boy Scout’s Explorer Program and she was with me when I applied for a job that was traditionally held by a man. I still enjoy being the only woman surrounded by men. I call it my Susannah Of The Mounties Syndrome. But I don’t like being discounted, dismissed, or underestimated just because I’m a girl. Cat Ballou taught me, that I don’t have to.

True Grit (1969)

Mattie Ross, in True Grit, is a character very much like my beloved Cat Ballou, but with one major difference, she has a strong sense of ethics. Like Cat Ballou she is tenacious and determined, but unlike Cat Ballou she would never break the law, or use her feminine charms to manipulate. She simply stated what was right, and wrong, and expected you to do the right thing, too.

I love the character of Mattie Ross. She had the gumption to stand up to the men played by John Wayne, Robert Duvall, and Glen Campbell, and very ably held her own. She was shrewd with money, good with a bargain, and wouldn’t take no for an answer. She had the courage to ask for help, but if she couldn’t get the help she needed, she was perfectly willing to do it herself. She was a woman way ahead of her time.

In the beginning of the film, the men completely dismissed Mattie as a little girl. But every time they knocked her down, she got right back up, and for every argument they gave her, she had an answer. My favorite line in the movie is when the men trick her and leave her on the wrong side of the river while they stand comfortably on the only ferry. She refuses to accept defeat and rides her horse across the rushing water. As John Wayne watches her amazing feat he remarks, “I like that girl, she reminds me of me.” At that moment, I wanted to be just like Mattie Ross.

Once their adventure was over and justice was served, you knew Mattie was going to run that ranch and run it well. She had won the respect of Rooster Cogburn and had made a friend for life. You could easy imagine her moving on to bigger and better things. She had all the tools she needed, and most of all she had true grit.

To Kill A Mocking Bird (1962)

As I mentioned earlier, I grew up in a neighborhood surrounded by a lot of boys. Due to this factor, I was very much the tomboy. When To Kill A Mockingbird came out in December of 1962 I was getting ready to enter Kindergarten in the fall. I grew up in a small suburban town, so I had lots of freedom to run around with my brother, just like the children in the movie. I remember identifying very strongly with Scout.

Even though I was young, I understood the moral messages of this movie. This is what I believe makes the book it was based on so great. By displaying these moral issues through the eyes of a child, they were simplified so much, that even a child could understand them.

About this same time, the very first black family moved into my town. I was proud when my parents greeted them and invited them to our church. The mother in this family was a teacher and my own mother drove with her all the way to the state capital to help her get her teaching credential cleared for our state. I was actually in her first, First Grade class. To Kill A Mockingbird helped to give me sensitivity to people different from myself, whether it was by race, economic status, or mental capabilities. My teacher, Mrs. Ficklin, re-enforced these values and has become my friend for life. Between the values taught to me in this film, and the ones taught to me by my parents and Mrs. Ficklin, I grew up with a strong moral code and an acceptance of people from all walks of life. That’s a pretty good legacy for a movie.

Pollyanna (1960)

I don’t believe I saw Pollyanna when it first came out. I would have been too young. I probably saw it on television. What I liked about Pollyanna was her attitude. She was orphaned, being forced to leave her home and move in with a stern aunt that she didn’t know. Most children would pout, or draw into themselves, but Pollyanna chose to be glad. She was grieving, lonely, and unsure of her new surroundings, but she chose to be glad.

This is a lesson I’m still trying to learn. Happiness is a choice. I would love to be a cheerful person all the time, spreading joy wherever I went. But I can be moody. I’m very sensitive to my environment, and one little bump in the road can set me off. But when I find myself heading in that direction I try to remember that I’m in charge of my own attitude. Being miserable is a choice and it takes a lot of work to maintain. By choosing to be glad, you are forsaking your circumstances and taking control of your life. Pollyanna is not just a character; it’s a way of life. It has even become a word. If you look up Pollyannaish in the dictionary it is described as an adjective which means pleasantly optimistic. I’m not very Pollyannaish in real life, but it is something I aspire to be. I choose to be glad.



Sense And Sensibility (1995)

Some movies I like because I can identify with the characters, and some movies I like because the characters have a qualities that I aspire to have. Sense And Sensibility is one such movie. I admire the character of Elinor Dashwood immensely. She is entrusted with a secret, and even though it goes against her own interests and causes her much grief, she has the uncommon integrity to keep that promise until circumstances release her from that trust.

I’ve always been attracted to films that display a time when honor, manners, and etiquette prevailed. But, even in those times, personal integrity was rare. It was more common to put on a proper front, and then act contrary behind closed doors. That is the stuff of good drama. But Elinor is a classic heroine. She keeps her values, her integrity, and her common sense, until the very end, and when the film reaches its conclusion, and her true love is restored to her, it never fails to make me weep.

Elinor is not the only example of noble behavior in this story, Colonel Brandon and Edward Ferras also behave honorably. This is one tale where nice guys don’t finish last. They both behave like gentlemen, they honor their commitments, they put other’s feelings first, and they display great patience. In the end, their integrity is rewarded with the women they love. And the women they love truly appreciate them.

I really wish I could be more like Elinor. There are so many times when I should keep my mouth shut, and then I get to a point where I can’t hold it in any more, and I blow it. Whenever I do, I think of Elinor, and vow to do better next time. Thank goodness she is a fictional character, or my slip-ups would be even more painful. As it is, Elinor is an ideal, one that I strive to live up to.


Fried Green Tomatoes (1991)

Tawanda! I love Fried Green Tomatoes, the movie, not the food. Although I may like the food, I’ve just never tried them. I love this movie because the women are strong, independent, and full of self-determination. They all don’t start that way. It is a journey, a wonderful journey, a difficult one, but the end of the road is a life well lived, and a freedom to live as one chooses.

If you asked me which character I most identified with, that would be a hard thing to do. I identify easily with Idgie, the tomboy, more comfortable in pants than dresses, and more likely to be found hanging with the boys. But, I also identify with Ruth. Ruth, who values kindness, charity, friendship and faith, a woman who is repressed, but eventually breaks free without losing those precious qualities. On the other hand, I also identify with Evelyn, a woman who is trying to discover the best in her self. Evelyn is not happy with her weight, and she is not happy when people walk all over her. She is desperately trying to find that delicate balance of being assertive, but still being genteel. If you put all three of these characters together, somewhere in the middle will be me.

It is rare to have a movie with such strong female characters. The story is delightful, moving, empowering, and full of good feminine statements. I only wish it would have come out earlier in my life. As the daughter of a minister, I know what it is to be repressed, to be afraid to speak out for fear of offending, to be embarrassed because I prefer to dress in more manly fashions. If this film had come to me earlier in my life, maybe I could have evoked the power of Tawanda much sooner.


Philadelphia Story (1940)

I was very young when I saw Philadelphia Story for the first time. I can’t remember if it was on TV or at a revival movie house, but it doesn’t matter. What does matter, is that movie ruined me for life. In this story Katherine Hepburn as Tracy Lord, was so magnificent, that three men fall in love with her. First, there was Cary Grant, her ex-husband. Realizing that he has made a terrible mistake letting her go, he drops everything and rushes to the scene, when he hears that she has become engaged. Then, there is Jimmy Stewart, as the newspaper reporter sent to cover the event. He arrives cynical, judgmental, and sarcastic, but after spending some time with Miss Lord, he falls in love with her, too. The third man, George Kittredge, is rich, dependable, well spoken and respected within the community. All Tracy has to do is decide which man will make her happy.

The reason this movie has ruined me for life is that the men in this film were so eloquent in declaring their love for her, that I have no tolerance for bumbling men. Every once in awhile a young man would approach me, attempt to declare his admiration, and if he was inarticulate, or lacked confidence, I would lose all interest. Blame it on the movies. I wanted a man who could speak his mind, display confidence, and make me feel like Tracy Lord, up on a pedestal. Since those men are rare, unless you buy a movie ticket, very few men have gotten past my defenses. I don’t believe that I am a snob; I’m not looking for flowery words, or poetry. I’m looking for articulation. The ability to know your own mind, and state how you feel, with honest, sincere, emotions.

I felt very cruel as a teenager. If I saw a boy struggling to speak to me, I would stand there patiently and watch him squirm until he had enough composure to say what he wanted. I noticed that other girls would help these boys along, encourage them, and even put words in their mouth. But that wasn’t me. My man had to be eloquent. I wasn’t looking for a smooth talker; I was looking for sincerity and thoughtfulness, and most of all, a man in touch with his feelings. Since it has been awhile since I found one of those, I guess I’ll go back to the movies.


Since You Went Away (1944)

Since You Went Away is a World War II drama that doesn’t show you the war. It takes place on the Home Front, back in the USA. Three soldiers meet on a transport plane and discover that they are all from the same hometown. They come from completely different social circles, so they have never met before. But, now they are united by a common experience and vow to watch out for each other once they return home.

The reason this film spoke to me so much as a young lady is that it gave me a historical perspective. I grew up in the sixties and seventies during the height of the women’s movement. I had so many struggles growing up in my quest to become independent and taken seriously as a woman, that this movie really touched my heart. In this film, the women left behind, had to fend for themselves, while their men were off to war. They had to manage their own finances, home repairs, get jobs, and handle any legal issues that arose. At first it was scary, but with each successful task, it became empowering. Women were discovering that they were not helpless females; they learned that they could fend for themselves. Many women found, that in some ways, that they had skills superior to their husbands, they had just never been given the chance.

I was impressed by these strong, brave, women. I also felt their pain when they were asked to step back into their submissive roles. Imagine how frustrating it would have been to be asked to leave your job so a returning veteran could take your place. After doing a good job for years, you are now being kicked to the curb, only because you are a woman.

The women in this film were not politicos, nor were they women’s libbers. They quietly fell out of ranks and slipped in dutifully behind the men. But, like Eve eating the apple, knowledge had been obtained. Women had been let out of the box, and even if only for a while, they knew that independence was possible, that marriage was not the only solution. These women were the trailblazers and I was following in their path. For me, this movie was an inspiration.



Die Hard (1988)

You are probably wondering why Die Hard is own my list. It is an excellent action film with a mostly male cast. But, what I liked about this film is that Holly Gennaro McClane was not the typical woman in distress. When terrorist villains take over her office, she remains cool, keeps her head, and stands up to the bad guy, toe to toe. It is the men around her that snivel, bargain, and try to manipulate their way out of things, often with disastrous results. Holly, just watches, and waits. She never makes a false move. And, when John McClane does come to her rescue, she is ready to lend him a hand. When she punches that jerk in the nose, it was a very satisfying cinematic moment. For once, they let the woman be strong.




What’s Up Doc? (1972)

What’s Up Doc? is another movie that you may think strange that it is on my list. I loved this movie. Not only is it very funny, the women are funny too. Barbra Streisand plays an irrepressible young woman who keeps managing to get herself in trouble. But, what I like about her is that she doesn’t settle for anything. She is trying to find her place in the world and she refuses to let anyone tell her where that is. She is also assertive and aggressive. When she recognizes what she wants, look out. Nothing will get in her way.

I am a far cry from being anything like this character, but I did like the idea that you can be funny, and still be smart and beautiful. This character broke the mold. She wasn’t the sidekick, or the ugly sister, or the dumb blonde. She was a fully realized woman and the comedy came from her wit, not her physical attributes. This movie gave me hope that attitudes about women may be changing.



It’s A Wonderful Life (1946)

When I’m asked to chose my favorite movie I always find to hard to pick just one. But when I’m pressed, I always chose It’s A Wonderful Life. What this movie has taught me is that our lives are intertwined and that we never know exactly what impact and influence on other people we have. I’m sure that when Jane Fonda was making Cat Ballou that she had no idea that a little girl in Northern California would be impacted for life. I’m sure that in the beginning, when Walt Disney started making his movies, that he had no idea that millions of little girls would shape their personalities and form their self-image based on the characters in his films.

Today, Disney is so self-aware of their girl-power influence, that they have a entire princess product lines, and often feature films with strong female roles. But I wonder what Walt himself would think of all this. He was an old –fashion guy. Was he conscious of his legacy as he went along, or did his heirs figure it out later?

When a director, or a producer creates a film, if it’s a good one, they touch lives. Whether they inspire, correct, instruct or inform, the potential to change lives is there. I love it when I go to a movie and come out different. There are few things in life that truly inspire.

In college I wrote a paper where I interviewed a lot of veterans and asked them what movies had inspired them to join up. It was amazing to me how a patriotic movie could influence someone to enlist in the military and risk their life. I’ve also heard of people having religious experiences in films. I once heard a speaker at church who admitted that he became a Christian after seeing the movie The Exorcist. He saw it as a teenager and became so disturbed by it, that he wanted to make sure he was on God’s side. The power of film is undeniable.

So, when I look back at the films in my life that inspired me, I’m glad that there were so many good ones. There is something visceral about film that other mediums don’t have. Sometimes I get a little discouraged when I see a lot of mediocre movies in a row. You become disappointed and begin to think that you’ll never see a good movie again. But then one comes along and your faith is restored. I love it when that happens.

In conclusion, I owe a lot to movies. Whether they molded my character, provided an escape, or act as a cautionary tale, movies have always been a big part of my life. I love expanding my world by seeing films from other countries, and I also like taking risks by seeing independent films. The idea is to keep an open mind. I also like the fact that film is communal. You can easily share it with a friend, or repeat the experience later, or years from now. I once wrote a letter to Jimmy Stewart and thanked him for It’s A Wonderful Life. I told him that I loved his movie so much that I would get emotional just watching the opening credits. I also explained that I looked forward to the times when I could share his film with others, and that is the beauty of film.